


Breathe

by sammi273



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Bottom Louis, Divorce, M/M, Miscarriage, Mpreg, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sad Louis, Top Harry, bat shit crazy Harry, larry stylinson - Freeform, zouis babies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-12
Updated: 2014-10-01
Packaged: 2018-02-17 02:39:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2293895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sammi273/pseuds/sammi273
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zayn divorces Louis when Louis has a miscarriage, and leaves Louis with their three other kids. Soon after, Louis and Harry quite literally bump into each other.</p><p>However, little does Louis know is that Harry isn't all that he turns out to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One~ Trust Is Kindled

I'm sorry Louis, I tried to get over it, but right now I really just can't. It's hard enough already knowing that..." Zayn trailed off, and instead of speaking, he handed me a handful of papers that I knew so well. "I want a divorce, it's the best for both of us."

Sniffling, I didn't bother to wipe away my tears.

"You can't possibly believe that, Z," I whispered, already knowing his response all too well.

"Oh but I do. How is our marriage supposed to continue on if we can't get past you having a miscarriage!?" Zayn sighed, lowering his voice. "Think about the children here. They can't keep seeing their parents fighting like this."

"We can make it through if we tried and really wanted to, but we would have to do it together, just like with all the other times shit hit the fan. A divorce won't help the kids at all, Zayn. They have already seen us fight, even before this, and they really need both parents to get through this too. They are hurting, just like we are, Z!"

"I can't Louis, because you and I both know that it is your own fault that you miscarried that baby."

***

First was Kyra thirteen years ago.

Zayn promised to love her, and will always provide for the both of us. He thought that we had to get married in order for him to carry out that promise.

So, he proposed to me, and we got married that summer.

Kyra was a winter baby, and I no longer saw her as a mistake, but as a blessing, because she was Zayn and I's daughter.

Seven years later was Kylie.

She came during a difficult time and situation. I get that Zayn was stressed since he was the only working parent since I was on paternal leave, and Kylie was going to come in a couple of months so we had to prepare. However, that was no reason for Zayn to hit Kyra just because she had accidentally broke one of his model cars for work.

He yelled at her, but I quickly jumped between them. Zayn shoved me against the wall, wrapping his hands around my neck. In that exact moment, my water broke, and I when I choked out Zayn's name he let me go.

Kylie was so tiny since she came early, but she was still healthy, thank goodness.

Since we had two children already, Zayn and I were going to do our best to be the best parents for Kyra and Kylie.

Kaleb came two years after.

It was a complete mistake, because during that time we were still trying to heal, but Zayn still ended up hurting us, and had brought up the idea of a divorce. He knew that what he was doing to us, our family, was wrong, and he was doing nothing but harm, so it was for the best. Once Zayn got the divorce papers out, my water broke.

The divorce papers were forgotten then.

Four years later, I conceived again, only this time instead of my water breaking, I found blood trickling down my inner thighs instead.

That was when I saw those divorce papers again after so many years.

***

Zayn and I filled out those divorce papers, knowing that it was for the best.

***

"Hey Kacy, is really too bad that you couldn't see my toy cars. They are the best, and I would always share them with you, you know." Kaleb paused a moment, sounding almost hesitant, "have to make my own toy cars since Daddy can't always buy us new toys since Papa not here right now to buy them. But Daddy helps me build them when he has time. Now will let Kylie talk now since she looks like she wants to go next."

I watched was Kylie softly grinned a bittersweet smile, "hi there. We miss you so much. It's really not fair that you couldn't even mature to the point where we could tell your gender. At least then we can all call you a he or a she. But anyways, we love you no matter. I can't help but pretend that I know exactly how you look. her voice broke, and eyes teared up. Shaking her small head, she buried her face into my stomach, and let her tears spill over.

I didn't try to console her, but I did card my fingers through her long hair multiple times, just so that she knew that I knew exactly what she was going through, same as everyone else, and we were going to be there for each other.

Kyra traced her fingertips over the rough surface of the grave stone.

"Hey there peanut. I don't want to sound mean at all, and I mean this in the best way possible, but I'm actually glad that you didn't live, not that you're dead. If that makes any sense at all. The reason why I say this is because you are at peace now, and now no one can ever hurt you, not even Papa."

***

"Come on you three, we've got to get going now, it's laundry night," I said later on that evening while holding Kylie and Kaleb's hands. Kyra insisted on walking by herself in protest that she was responsible enough to walk alone now.

Sniffling, Kylie nodded as we exited the cemetery. As we did, I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand on edge, signaling that someone was there behind us watching our every move. However, as I turned my head, I saw nothing but the tops of gravestones.

Later that night when the kids were asleep, I pecked the tops of their heads without any of them waking. heading out with a sweat shirt on, the hood was pulled over my head.

When I visit the gravestone with the kids, I don't talk to Kacy, knowing already that I would start crying too. I don't want to cry in front of the kids, it wouldn't help them at all.

As I neared the small grave, I could already feel the pressure of tears building behind my eyelids.

"Hey baby," I whispered. "I miss you so much, even if you were in my tummy for only a couple of months. It's just so empty now. Kacy... I only named you that because I couldn't have a nameless baby... even if you probably won't know your name. Of course, with us not knowing your gender, it was a bit hard to choose a name, but not impossible. It is really too bad that we didn't get to see each other. I love you so much, and yet, you couldn't possibly have had enough time to return that feeling. Anyways Kacy, I have to go since I left the others on their own, and I don't want one of them to wake up alone with a nightmare. Love and miss you baby."

The second time I was there, I could have sworn that someone was watching me. However, this time I didn't turn to look behind me, knowing already that I would see nothing as I had before.

Sniffling and wiping away my tears, I started on my way home.

***

"Has your target been acquired agent?" the Boss asked as the two of us sat in a conference room. No one dares to disappoint the Boss, because we know that he will end us in a heart beat, without a second thought.

"Yes Boss," I nodded. "Phase one is complete."

Taking out a blank piece of paper, the Boss nodded at me to continue, "I didn't doubt it. You are the best that we've got. So tell me about him. Is he really a carrier like we heard?"

"Yes sir, he has three children already, and miscarried another. Repeatedly, Louis Tomlinson, when talking to the gravestone, would make references as to when the baby was in his... womb."

"Ah yes. He has children, what are their genders and ages?"

"Two girls and a boy. The boy is four. The oldest is thirteen. The middle daughter is six."

"Who was his previous marriage with?"

"Zayn Javaad Malik, but they got divorced not so long after the miscarriage."

"Good, good. So he isn't seeing anyone and is still single, correct?"

"Yes Boss."

"I guess that this would be where you some in then, Agent." The Boss said, an evil smirk was apparent on his face.

***

"Daddy, Daddy the milk went bad!" Kaleb hollered from the kitchen.

"Okay Kaleb, I'll get more today when everyone else is in school."

"Daddy, do you know where my report on butterflies is at!?" Kylie called from her bedroom.

"It's on the kitchen table, Hon."

Kyra rushed past me to dig through the laundry basket of clothes that I was folding. "What are you looking for love?" I sighed.

"Socks." She answered simply.

"Kyra, you won't find them in there. I washed all the white clothes last night when we got home. Where are your socks from then?"

"Well I don't know! If I did, would you think I'd be digging through here?"

Right when I opened my mouth to speak, I heard a crash, then Kylie yelled loudly from the kitchen. "Daddy! Kaleb spilled water on my report!"

"It was accident! Said sorry!" Kaleb whimpered, "no mean to."

I sighed. "Kyra, just wear a pair of my socks," I said as I got up and headed to the kitchen. "Kaleb come tell me your side of the story. You know that you can't reach that water on your own."

Kaleb sucked his thumb and shifted his weight to one side, looking near tears, "no like dry cereal, was gonna put water in by myself like a big boy, but I falled when try to get up on chair, and got a booboo. Spilled water when I falled. Was accident."

"Okay," I nodded, picking him up. "Where did you get hurt Kale?"

"M-my knee," he whimpered.

"He twisted it when he fell," Kylie shyly offered the information, no longer focusing on her report.

"Thanks Kylie can you please be a big help and clean up the water? Your report will dry off better if you do. If you want to rewrite it then, you've got an hour."

She nodded, "okay."

Kaleb sniffled pitifully into my neck, and Kyra poked my back so that I carefully turned around. Her eyes settled on Kaleb for a couple seconds before going to mine, "dad what drawer are your socks in?"

"Top one, love."

I walked into the bathroom, and carefully set Kaleb on the counter. When I saw Kaleb's face, I was surprised to see him wiping away tears. Kaleb is my trooper, and nearly never cries, even when he was a baby.

Shushing him, I thumbed away one of his salty tears. "It's okay baby, let me take a look at it okay?"

Once again he sniffled, but nodded his consent.

After a lot of poking and prodding, I came to the conclusion that his knee was only sprained, not broken.

"Good news, Kale it's not broken at all. But I still have to wrap it up in some gauze and we'll ice it after this so that it won't hurt as much anymore."

Using gauze, I wrapped his injured knee while Kyle cried softly into my neck, only whimpering occasionally as he sucked on his small thumb.

"It hurts Daddy," he finally said, and my heart broke, not wanting my baby to be in any pain at all.

"Sh I know it does baby, but it's gonna get better in a few days, just trust me, okay?"

He nodded while sniffling, "okay."

***

With the girls at school, and with Kaleb's knee iced, and his system filled with children's Motrin, later that afternoon, Kaleb and I were out getting groceries. Of course, Kaleb is in the cart with me pushing it. He said that his knee wasn't hurting as badly anymore so we could get the groceries.

"Do you remember everything that we need to buy love?"

Nodding enthusiastically, Kaleb held out his ten fingers, ticking off each finger as he named the items we needed, "milk, eggs, sugar, apples, cereal, pancake mix, syrup, bacon, cauliflower, and pepperoni!"

"Good job Kaleb. We need more band- aids too. While we're here would you like anything?"

He shook his head, "no need anything."

"Okay then, babe."

After ten minutes, I had gotten over half of what we needed to get. However, the syrup that I wanted was super heavy, and on a super high shelf, just my luck.

Suddenly, just as my fingers managed to grab hold of the syrup bottle's handle, pain blossomed in my hip as someone's cart ran into my side, and I fell over from the impact of it. The syrup fell off of the shelf and landed painfully on top of me.

For a moment, I literally thought that I had died, but I knew that I hadn't because I could hear Kaleb screaming for me. When I looked up, I could see the owner of the cart's vibrant, but worried green eyes. A pale hand reached down in front of my face, and instead of grabbing the hand, I chose to continue studying the person in front of me. Their dark curls were messy and swooped slightly into his eyes. Although it was messy, it was a beautiful mess. His lips were so full and pink that they were almost feminine.

"Oops," he spoke in a low raspy voice.

"Hi," I embarrassingly squeaked, then cleared my throat.

He chuckled slightly, and carefully removed the syrup bottle from off of me, accidentally brushing my stomach slightly, and a light blush fanned across my cheeks.

"Hi, are you okay?"

The moment he said that, I was suddenly reminded of the pain in my hip, and winced a bit. "My hip hurts some, but that's about it."

Nodding, he reached his hand out again. "Okay then, maybe you can put some ice on it when you get home, and stay off that side."

I grabbed onto his much larger hand, and he pulled me up carefully.

'Damn he has muscles,' was all that I could possibly think once I saw his arms.

"Okay," I nodded after a moment of awkward staring. "I'm Louis by the way."

He grinned slightly, "Harry."

***

Harry and I had traded phone numbers so that I could call him when I got home, and tell him that I was okay.

Kaleb reached out to lay a small chubby hand on my cheek, "Daddy okay? No hurt?"

"No hurt Kaleb, I am just fine, I promise, but how about we finish the shopping later."

Once he nodded in agreement, I paid for what items I had already gotten, and we started on our walk home. Zayn took the car when he left, not that I really mind.

I can't drive right now anyways because of the miscarriage.

The moment I got home, my skin began to crawl, and I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. Following close behind, Kaleb wrapped his arms around one of my legs as I started to put away the groceries.

When I finished, I carefully took Kaleb into my arms, even though I wasn't supposed to.

He yawned, pressing his face into my neck, "tired Daddy."

"Okay baby, wanna take a nap then?"

"Nap with Daddy please?" he nodded.

"Of course, I murmured, pressing a small kiss to his tiny nose as I began walking to my bedroom.

Gently laying him down in my bed, I laid beside him, pulling his small body into my arms.

"Sing to me?" he quietly asked.

"'Course," I mumbled, before I began to sing random songs by The Fray that I knew he liked.

Half an hour later, Kaleb was fast asleep, and I got out of bed quietly as not to wake Kaleb. Taking out my phone, I dialed Harry's number, almost immediately he picked up.

"Hello?" he asked, his voice was low and rough, on the edge of menacing.

"Hey Harry it's me Louis. You know, from earlier in the store."

"Oh," his voice changed drastically to guilt, and almost remorse, "hey Louis. How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine. My hip doesn't hurt as badly anymore," I lied, pulling up my shirt to inspect my injured hip to find a large dark bruise, and I winced slightly from just looking at it.

"That's good. Did you just get home? It's been like an hour."

"Eh yeah, sort of... I just had to walk home so it takes a bit of time to get home..." I trailed off.

"Oh my goodness, and I went and hit you with a cart. I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, really it is," I assured him, blushing slightly.

"Okay, but can I take you out on a date to make it up to you?" he sounded almost hesitant when he asked.

I myself was tentative when answering, especially with the given circumstances. "Well... uhm... maybe, but I'm not sure. I do have my kids to care about..."

"I might know someone who would be more than happy to look after them while we're out if you'd like," Harry suggested.

"Maybe, but I'll have to meet and get to know him before," I answered, unsure of myself, nervously chewing at my bottom lip.

"Okay, I can set up a day sometime you can meet him if you text me your address, and then I'll call you and tell you what day would be best. Sounds good?"

Forgetting that he couldn't see me, I nodded, then cleared my throat, "I mean yes, definitely."

"Okay then. Until next time Louis."

"Bye- bye," I grinned slightly before hanging up.

Later that evening while I was applying ice to me bruised and sore hip, I didn't hesitate to text my address to Harry. However, little did I know that was exactly what they wanted me to do.

Even later that evening, I got a text back from Harry, 'Liam said that he could meet up with you tomorrow if that's good with you. :)'

'Sure, what time?' I answered with a question.

I laid in bed waiting for his response, and when he finally did, it was an hour later when I was nearly asleep. 'Around three if that's fine. :)'

'Perfect. I'll talk to you later then.'

'Okay, goodnight. ;)'

***

"Okay Kyra, Kylie, and Kaleb. You all know the drill for when people come over, but he's going to be your future babysitter if it's all good with you guys and me, so tell me what you think about him, okay?"

Kyra, Kylie, and Kaleb all nodded in unison.

"Why would we need a baby, though?" Kyra asked, a dark eyebrow raised, arms crossed in question.

"Well... Daddy's got a date." I grinned slightly.

Kaleb blinked, "is it with that man in the store that ran you down with his cart? I no mike him much. No want you to be hurt Daddy."

I chuckled slightly nervous, "well yes, but he apologized, and now he's taking me out on a date as an apology."

"So, let me get this straight, you're going on a date with a man that you just met? Did you not learn anything from Frozen?" Kyra nearly exploded at me.

Opening my mouth, I was about to reply, however the doorbell rang and beat me to it.

Sighing, I cleared my mind before going to the door, mumbling to myself, "well here goes nothing."

***

Three hours later, Liam walked out, Kaleb nearly clinging to him to keep him from leaving. Kyra was actually smiling for the first time since Zayn and I have gotten the divorce. Kylie was giggling, and waving at Liam.

Liam seemed nice enough to me, and definitely earned my okay.

"So what do you think of him?" I asked.

"I wish that he was your boyfriend," Kaleb said, and Kylie nodded in agreement.

"Guys, Dad has a date, not a boyfriend. There is a difference. But anyways, Liam is very nice and passed my babysitter test, but I would like to meet your date, or at least know more about him, like his name per se."

Exhaling heavily, I nodded and sat down, "I guess that it's only fair. What would you like to know?"

"His name," Kyra answered, and the younger two nodded, Kaleb sat in my lap, Kylie next to me, and Kyra on the floor.

"Wanna know too," Kaleb nodded, sucking his thumb into his mouth, and looked at me with large eyes filled with question.

"Okay. His name his Harry."

"Just Harry, no last name?" Kyra asked.

I thought a moment, "I don't remember him giving it... But then again I didn't give mine either, so can you really blame him?"

"Yes, I can if he ran you over with his cart," Kyra pointed out as if it was obvious.

I sighed, "whatever, what else do you want to know?"

"What does he look like?" Kylie asked shyly.

"He's really tall, taller than me, and pretty muscular, his eyes are green, and his hair is dark and curly. I find him quite... very attractive."

"You can't date a man you just met, just because he's attractive. You don't really who he really is, Dad. I just don't want you to get hurt again." Kyra admitted.

When I invited her into a hug, she immediately wrapped her arms around my neck. "Don't worry, I won't get hurt, and I won't ever let him hurt any one of you three. I love you guys too much to allow anything to hurt you all."

"The ones you love the most are the ones you hurt the most," I can just barely hear her mumble.

***

Kyra, Kaleb, and Kylie engulfed me in a group hug when the doorbell rang the next night.

"Have fun, but be careful, Daddy," Kyra advised.

"Of course Hon, you guys know to call or text if something goes wrong, right?" I asked.

They all nodded up at me.

"Okay then. I love you all." I pecked the tops of all their heads, and gave them the chance to give me a peck on the cheek before I opened the door, and was greeted with the sight of Harry and Liam standing at the doorway.

Harry grinned, "well hello there Mr. Tomlinson."

Liam huffed and rolled his eyes, "kids don't pay any attention to him at all, he's just being a weirdo as always."

I chuckled, and the kids giggled," hello Harry. Kids, please make sure you behave for Liam, and have fun okay. Please remember that, bed time is at nine thirty."

"Don't worry I'll get them to bed in time," Liam paused to look at Kaleb, Kylie, and Kyra to wink, "right kids?"

They all nodded in sync.

"Okay then, goodnight, sleep well."

Then just like that, I put my children's lives into someone else's hands.

***

Two hours later, Harry and I were waiting in line to get onto the ferris wheel, there was apparently a carnival in the area that I hadn't known about.

Harry had won me three stuffed animals, all which I have embarrassingly named, and he also bought cotton candy, which we're sharing, since I possibly couldn't finish the whole thing.

"You've managed the impossible," Harry chuckled.

I raised an eyebrow, "what did I do now?"

"Well Mr. Tomlinson, I am afraid to inform you that you have cotton candy on your nose, and your forehead. Oh, and there's even a bit in your eyelash." Harry chuckled.

"Seriously?"

"No, not really, I'm just kidding. There's only a bit on your bottom lip is all," Harry said, dark green eyes darting away from mine a moment to look at my lip before looking back into my eyes.

"Oh, okay," I could feel my cheeks heat up as his eyes darkened when I swiped a quick tongue over my lip.

Thankfully for me, the ferris wheel stopped, and the person in charge of it had helped everyone off, and was motioning for Harry and I to get on. Harry stepped aside with him for a moment, and talked animatedly for a few moments before returning back next to me.

Following the guy's instructions, Harry and I got into the small seat, and buckled up tightly. Once the little door was closed, and everyone else had gotten in, the ferris wheel was in motion.

Harry wrapped an arm around me, and I leaned into him. breathing in his warm and almost familiar scent.

"Comfortable there Louis?" Harry asked.

I hummed, "very."

"Same." He didn't say anything more, but I could tell that he was smiling from the way he tightened his hold on me for a moment.

"Harry?" I asked breaking the silence between us.

"Yes?"

"How do you know my last name?" I asked.

His thumb brushed against my shoulder, "you gave it to me, don't you remember?"

"Oh... what's your last name then?" I asked, "well if it's not too weird for you to give it out that is."

He chuckled a deep and beautiful chuckle, "no it's fine, after all you are on a date with me, so you might as well know. It's Styles."

"Oh," I murmured, committing his last name to memory.

"Look, we're almost at the top," Harry pointed.

I sat up a bit straighter, peering up at the sky to see the purples and indigo's of the sunset as the first of the bright stars started to light up the sky.

"Wow," I whispered. "It's beautiful."

"Like you," he murmured, and my heart skipped a beat as I turned to look into his eyes.

I bit my bottom lip, "do you really think so?"

Instead of answering with words, Harry cupped my cheek in his much larger one, and slowly leaned in until his lips were just barely touching mine. "Is this okay?" he whispered, I could feel his warm breath against my lips.

Nervously biting the inside of my cheek, I nodded, and that was the moment that our lips connected.

***

After that first date, there were plenty more that followed over the course of two months.

Each one, was fun, and I got to learn more about Harry.

The kids had their fun with Liam, though I can sense that they would rather spend more time with me instead.

"Daddy, do you have to go on a date with Harry tonight?" Kaleb asked, hugging my leg, "no want you to leave."

I sighed, "it would be rude if I didn't go, and cancelled on him the last minute, baby."

"But I miss Daddy a lot. Liam is fun, but wanna have fun with Daddy sometimes too." Kaleb tried explaining.

As a single parent, many difficult decisions regarding children come into play, and well, this was just one of those moments.

"Okay, Kaleb I won't leave tonight, but we'll have to reschedule the date."

"No care, just wanna spend time with Daddy."

I nodded, "of course babe. Harry will understand."

Kaleb's face lit up, "okay, I'll tell Kylie, and Kyra!" He said excitedly as he ran into the kitchen.

Sighing, I smiled fondly after him before taking out my phone to inform Harry about the date changes.

'Okay then, we can go the day after tomorrow. I have something important to ask you.' Harry texted, and my heart skipped a beat, and not in the good way. Especially because Harry didn't use a smiley face at the end, so it's probably something bad more than likely.

Oh well, I knew that we weren't going to last that long anyways.

***

The next date we had, he insisted that it would be at my house, and it took a bit to convince me to go through with it, but I did.

"So what did you want to ask me?" I asked, biting the inside of my cheek where it was already starting to heal.

He shifted nervously from foot to foot, and I looked at my own feet. "Well... I was wondering if you wanted to be my boyfriend," with curious eyes, he peered at me, assessing me silently.

"Oh..." was all that I could even manage to get out of my mouth, because I know what the next step is, and it's too soon still, even if it has been a few months.

"You don't have to answer now of course, you can use as much time as you want to think. I know that it's hard to answer, and I know that it's something that I probably shouldn't be asking of you so soon. But you're just so beautiful inside, and out, so I want to have you all to myself."

"I don't know Harry, it's just that I don't want to get hurt again like I did with Zayn." I tried explaining to him.

"I know that you don't, but I am not Zayn, and I won't act like he did at all, I promise."

Biting my bottom lip in thought, I ran my fingers through my hair before I slowly nodded, "I think that my answer is... yes..." my yes was no more than a whisper, because it's so hard to say that again.

Grinning widely, Harry picked me up and twirled me around, "thank you so much, thank you."

Squealing, I wrapped my arms around his neck, and he pecked me gently on the lips. Just as he pulled away, Kyra, Kylie, and Kaleb walked in. Harry gently set me down, and I grinned.

"I don't believe that we have formally met," Harry said, looking at the kids.

The kids stared at me for a couple of moments, then stared at Harry. I motioned for one of them to talk, and thankfully Kyra did.

"My name is Kyra, and I am thirteen years old." She held out her hand politely, and while she studied Harry, Harry also studied her.

"Hello Kyra, nice to meet you," Harry lightly shook her hand.

"Hi mister, I'm Kylie, and I'm six years old," Kylie said, looking at me for reassurance, and I nodded so that she knew she was doing the right thing.

Harry grinned slightly, and held out his hand, "hello Kylie, it's nice to meet you as well."

Hesitantly, she reached out her hand to grab his. "Likewise."

"And what's your name buddy?" Harry asked, bending over so that he was eye- level with Kaleb.

"I'm Kaleb, I am four years old, and I like to play with cars," Kaleb answered excitedly. "Do you like cars too?"

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you Kaleb," Harry smiled. "And yes, I like to play with cars, only I may play it a tad bit different than you might." However, happiness wasn't the only emotion hidden behind that smile.

***

The kids have taken a rather strong liking to Harry, and are always asking me to bring over Harry, which I didn't disagree to.

Harry is good with the kids, lucky enough for me.

However, Harry is more observant than what I would have like, as he's looking around the kitchen.

"Oh, I haven't noticed this picture before, is it an ultrasound?"

I bit my bottom lip, feeling as if a lightning bolt had struck me as I saw the black and white picture in his hand. Even though I could feel tears gathering behind my eyes, I quickly blinked them away, and nodded. "Yes it is."

"Is it Kaleb's? No wait, this is dated for just a few months ago. Did you have a baby recently or something?"

"No, I didn't," I answered, and we left it at that.

Later when Harry and I were going to my room, he just happened to notice a closed and locked door, and casually questioned me about it.

"What's this room for?"

"St-storage," I stuttered.

He nodded slowly, eyes studying the door. "Then you wouldn't mind if I looked around would you?"

Eyes on the floor, I shook my head, and slowly moved to unlock the door with my key that I had kept hidden for the past few months. I could feel Harry's eyes burning into the back of my head, watching my every move.

The room was supposed to be a nursery for Kacy.

When I stepped in and saw the yellow painted walls, crib, baby toys, and boxes and boxes filled with clothes and other baby items, all I could think of was about how it was my fault that my baby's gone, and no one but my own.

Sniffling, I wiped away a tear, and ran my fingers through my hair, resting the palm of my other hand over my flat and empty stomach. The dam broke, and a sob left my lips as I picked up a teddy bear.

All the kids get their own unique teddy bear when they're born, and this one was supposed to be little Kacy's. Hugging the bear tightly against my stomach, I squeezed my eyes shut as hot tears began to stream silently down my cheeks.

"Louis, sh it's okay, it's okay Lou Lou," a deep voice said soothingly, their arms wrapped around me from behind.

"I- I c-couldn't s-s-save him," I sobbed. "I c-couldn't, and it w-was all m-my f-fault!"

He tightened his hold on me, his hands covered my smaller ones, "it wasn't your fault Louis, whatever it was."

I turned in his hold to bury my head into his neck, and clutched him tightly. "I l-lost him," I whimpered repeatedly, "I l-lost him."

"Your baby?" Harry asked softly, carefully.

All I could do was nod.

"I'm so sorry," Harry whispered, soothingly rubbing my back. "It's not your fault, not unless if you did it on purpose."

"But you don't understand! Z-Zayn s-said th-that-" he cut me off by pressing his lips against mine briefly before pulling away.

"Don't listen to anything he says, because he's wrong. Do you trust me?"

Biting the inside of my cheek, I shook my head, "I'm not even sure if I can trust myself, let alone other people."

***

Since I've told Harry about my miscarriage, he has been around a lot more, and spending more time with the kids and I.

Sometimes he will ask weird questions, but I think that it's only to understand some things better.

Apparently, he likes to randomly ask me these questions especially when we're making out in my bed.

Pulling away from me, panting lightly was when he asked, "you do have regular plumbing like a male right?"

Licking my bottom lip, I nodded.

"But if I were to fuck you right now without a condom, you would get pregnant?" Harry asked bluntly, and somewhat fascinated.

Blushing, I nodded.

"Wow, well that must be... difficult."

Once again, I nodded, "believe me, it is."

He hummed in thought before cupping my cheek, and leaning in again, "I'll remember that." I crashed my lips against his.

***

Now whenever I'm around Harry, I don't feel fond like I used to.

It's a lot stronger, and something that I have never felt before.

I think that I love Harry, but I can't be quite sure if the feeling is mutual. If anything, he probably hates me because I turned him down for sex last night.

Even though I love him, I still feel that it's too soon after Kacy to become sexually active again.

I explain this to him last night, and I think that he understood, even though he did seem a bit disappointed. He still laid in bed with me that last night , but he didn't hug me as close to him as he did the night before.

Sighing, I folded another pair of Kylie's underwear, and put them in her pile.

Harry walked over to me, a serious gleam in his eyes. "Lou, I have something important to tell you."

I frowned slightly, biting into the inside of my cheek, "and what would that be?"

"I know it may sound weird, but people are after you, because they know that you can carry children." Harry said, studying me closely.

"Sure sure," I mumbled.

"No really, it's true. Their Boss is the worst, and won't stop stalking you and your family until he gets you."

"And how do you know about this?" I asked, only slightly scared now.

"Because I'm in an agency that works against them, and it's my job to protect you." Harry answered, grabbing my hand, however I only pulled it back out of his grasp.

"Is that the only reason why we're together right now?"

"No Louis, it's not. I'm here because I love you, and I wouldn't ever want anything to happen to you, you have to trust me on this."

I didn't answer, not knowing what else to say, and my mouth suddenly went dry.

"Louis, do you even trust me?"

I did n't even hesitate before answering, "yes, I do."

"Then, you'll have to listen to me in order to protect yourself and your family."


	2. Part Two~ Trust is Shattered, And The Shards Scarred The Both Of Us

"Zayn no get away from him! What the Hell is wrong with you!?" I yelled, pushing him away from Kaleb, and hugged a sobbing and bleeding Kaleb to my slightly enlarged stomach.

"What the Hell is wrong with me!? What the Hell is wrong with you!? What gives you the right to just push me around?" Zayn yelled, getting in my face, his sweat dripped disgustingly onto my skin.

"What give you the right to push and knock any us around!? Whatever I do is always in self defense, and right now, I can call the police and they will arrest your ass in two seconds flat!"

I motioned for Kaleb to run upstairs, which he gratefully did without Zayn running to chase after him.

"How dare you talk to me like that in front of our child, like I'm inferior! I'm the one who pays for everything in this fucking house because you can't stop being a slut and keep getting your ass pregnant!"

Clearing my throat, I bit the inside of my cheek, "Zayn, can you please just calm down before you say something that you'll regret?"

"No, because you started this whole thing, and I want you to stop fucking telling me what to do all the time!" Zayn exploded, and I yelped as he pushed me to the floor.

Tears sprang to my eyes as a sharp jolt of pain went through my stomach. Before I could even role out of the way, Zayn's boot connected to my side.

"Zayn stop it!" I sobbed, out.

"Stop telling me what to do!" Zayn yelled louder, kicking my back this time as I curled into myself.

An even sharper pain coursed through my stomach again, making me cry out, and suddenly I felt light headed as I could feel something trickling down the insides of my thighs.

"Z-Zayn th-the b-ba-by," I whimpered, knowing that these pains were too strong to be normal contractions.

The last thing I felt was the pain from another one of Zayn's kicks.

The last thing I saw was Zayn's boot come away with blood.

The last thing I thought was, 'God I can't lose my baby.'

My vision then blackened.

I woke up to the sound of Kaleb's quiet whimpering and sniffling. Quickly, I attempted to jump up, however Harry's arm wrapped around me prevented me from doing so.

"Sh it's okay Lou, he's okay, just had a nightmare is all. I took care of it already," Harry said softly.

"But Zayn, and th-the baby- ! Oh my God the baby-" my hands went to my flat and empty stomach.

"Zayn's not here anymore, love, it's just me. It's only me, and you trust me don't you?"

Sniffling, I nodded.

"See, you trust me to protect you and the kids, and I will okay. Zayn isn't here anymore."

Nodding, I buried my face into his chest. "Okay," I answered softly. "Is Kaleb okay?"

"Yes, he just had a dream about a lion that wouldn't let him or you guys out of a cage." Harry answered.

I sighed in relief and nodded, "thank you Harry."

That was the moment when I decided that I loved Harry, and trusted him with the kids' lives as well as my own.

Now when I look into my future, I don't see myself alone. I see myself with Harry, and even possibly more children.

***

Early the next morning, I got out of bed and stared at myself in the mirror, my lips moved, and words came out, but none of the words I was saying sounded right.

"Harry, I- I've got something important to tell you..." I trailed off. "Well you see, when I'm with you I just... you make me want to trust and love again and I..." Shaking my head I stopped mid sentence and sighed before mumbling to myself. "No no, it can't sound too cliche either."

Shaking my head once more, I walked out of the bathroom and back into my own room, speech forgotten.

Besides, what's the use in rehearsing lines that no one will hear or even care about?

***

It's yet another night that I've woken up panting after a nightmare about Zayn. It's yet another night that I could hear Kaleb's soft cries through the walls since his room is right next to mine.

Harry isn't here tonight, because he had to work. So I got out of bed, still slightly sweaty, and walked into Kaleb's room, even though I wold probably scare the poor kid looking like I did now.

I haven't been getting a lot of sleep due to nightmares, so dark bruise- like circles shadow beneath my eyes. And I'm pretty sure that I have a horrible case of bed head, but I probably smell even worse.

Besides the point, I don't think Kaleb will really care how I look like, especially right now.

Opening the door to Kaleb's room, I found his five nightlights on, and his reading light, however Kaleb was hiding under his cars sheet and blanket.

Carefully sitting on the edge of his bed, I rubbed his side, but much to my surprise, he cringed away from my touch. "Kale-y it's just me baby, it's just Daddy."

Very cautiously he peeked out from underneath his blankets, and I was able to see his red tear filled eyes, his small thumb in his mouth, and his teddy bear, Mr. Stuffy, tightly in his grasp. "D-daddy?"

"Yes, it;'s just Daddy, Hon. Can you do Daddy a favor?" I asked him.

Sniffling and nodding, Kaleb crawled out from under his blankets and into my lap.

"Can you close your eyes and count for me and show me how high you can go?" I asked softly, holding him closely to me. With Kaleb and his nightmares, it's better to calm him down first, and get his mind off of the memories, so that he'll calm down.

He nodded, and took his thumb out of his mouth then closed his eyes. "Ok-ay... one... two... three... four...."

When he got to the number ten, I spoke, "pause a moment and tell me your name, then continue."

"Kaleb... eleven... twelve..."

I nodded, even though he couldn't see me, but didn't speak until he got to twenty, "very good. Now tell me... what's your older sister's name?"

"Kylie... twenty-one... twenty-two..."

We continued on like that until he got to the number one hundred and thirty, then we stopped, because he had calmed down. It was silent until he broke the silence.

"I looked," Kaleb said quietly, as if it were such a horrible confession.

"At what Kale?" I asked just as gently.

"At what happened," Kaleb whispered. "Lotta blood."

Then suddenly I knew exactly what he was talking about, and my heart absolutely broke for him, "baby, I told you to go upstairs, why didn't you listen?"

"Did, but went back down to make sure Daddy was okay. Papa no see me, but I saw both of you, and told Kyra to call the amb-lance. Sorry fo' no listening."

"Sh, it's okay baby. It could have ended up a lot worse if you hadn't told Kyra to call the ambulance. That was a very brave thing of you to do, you know."

He sniffled, "really?"

I nodded, "yes really."

"Okay." Was all he simply said before hesitantly speaking. "Kyra has been up all night trying to get Kylie to sleep. Do you think maybe we can all sleep together like one big sleepover?"

I nodded, "Of course we can. That would be good for everyone so we can all get so sleep."

And that night at 11:45 p.m., that was exactly what we did.

***

That morning when I woke up, I immediately, but quietly got up, and Kylie who was beside me also woke up, and whispered quietly.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded, and held a finger up to lips signaling for her to be quiet. Understanding, she nodded, and cautiously got up, stepping over little hands and little limbs, following my footsteps. We walked into the living room, and I sat on the couch, Kylie in my lap.

"Hey princess, Kaleb told me that you were up all last night," I whispered, as if I was telling a secret.

"Well yes, but it's not for what you think. I wasn't having the dreams, Kyra was, and she was keeping me up, so I woke her up, and we ended up talking about a lot of things."

Slightly surprised, I couldn't do anything in response, but nod. "Oh. Is... do you get any nightmares?"

She shook her head, "nope, because Papa isn't here to hurt us anymore, and I know that it isn't gonna happen again, so I don't find any use in having nightmares about it, I guess."

I sighed, "I wish that we all had that sort of mentality, but Papa really left his scar on some of us."

She nodded, "I know that he did, but there's no use in thinking about it now, because we have Harry, and he'll protect us all."

***

"Dad, I need to talk to you alone later, it's very important," Kyra said lowly the next evening.

I nodded, "of course."

Kaleb was playing cars and dolls with Kylie, and Harry was in the kitchen cooking dinner. It's laundry week again, and Kyra volunteered herself to help me with the folding this time.

"Dinner's ready!" Harry called out from the kitchen.

Immediately, Kylie and Kaleb got up and ran to the kitchen. Kyra finished folding the shirt that was in her hands before she got up as well to follow the younger two to the kitchen.

"I'll be there in just a moment!" I called out, wanting to finish folding the rest of that basket since there's not that much left.

"Take your time, we won't start eating until you come in here." Harry answered.

True to his word, everyone was sitting around the table, pasta was still untouched on their plates. I grinned and sat down between Kyra and Kylie, across from Harry and Kaleb. "Well thank you. Now that I'm here, I guess that we can begin eating, then."

Five minutes into the meal, I found myself feeling slightly lightheaded, however that was probably because it is super hot in here.

My vision became slightly blurry just a couple of minutes later, and I blinked, looking around the table. Kaleb looked green in the face, and was leaning to the right to the point where he was practically falling out of his chair. My heart skipped a beat once I noticed that Kylie had her arm propped up against the table, and she was leaning heavily on it. Kyra, much to my surprise, was out cold.

Harry was sitting next to Kaleb, a speculative smirk on his face as he watched what was going on.

When I tried to speak, my words came out slurred, "'Arry what'd ya put 'n the food?"

He shrugged innocently just as my body began to feel very heavy, and I fell out of my chair, "just a bit of GHB, similar to what you call 'date rape'."

When I tried to furrow my eyebrows, I found that I couldn't, and I found the same result when I tried to scream out of frustration. Fear and remorse filled me as I heard Harry talking on his cellphone, "did it Liam, hurry up and park the van. I'll take care of tying them up."

Harry got up from where he was seated to walk over to me, "you know what Tomlinson? For someone that can't trust anyone, you sure were quick to let me into your home. Boy did that make my job a Hell of a lot easier."

There was then a sharp pain in my head as Harry's boot collided into the side of my head, and I saw the familiar sight of a bloody boot just before everything went black.

***

The first thing that I registered when I became conscious again was that I was in the back of a van with my kids, who were all still knocked out.

What came next was that I could see the back of Harry's dark curls, as well as Liam's buzz cut brown hair.

Last, I was aware that I was tied up and gagged, but couldn't move even if I tried, I have a pounding headache with dried blood caked to my face, and I feel sick, very sick.

Harry's eyes met mine in the rear view mirror, and I glared at his prideful and confident eyes.

"Don't even try to escape, Lou Lou," he mocked me. "That drug that a gave you guys is enhanced, and can last for up to forty five hours, nearly two days. If I were you, even I would admit defeat."

A deep sense of fear flooded me, because I don't care what they did to me, it's my children than I'm worried about.

Harry must've sensed what I was thinking about because of his answer, "don't worry, the Boss won't allow any of us to get to you until the drug wears off, but once it does, you all are in for Hell, I assure you."

An even deeper sense of remorse filled me as the van continued on it's way mile by mile, bringing us closer to our destination.

That was the one true moment in my life that I wish that Zayn was here to protect us, because I knew that I did something wrong that is absolutely undo-able.

***

I haven't slept at all since I've became conscious, too afraid that they were going to try and do something while I was asleep, and I wasn't there to prevent it. Despite the fact that I am still immobile, I can at least try.

Harry's tired, yet conceited eyes met mine once more, "you know, I would sleep if I were you. Believe me, once we get there, the Boss won't let you sleep a wink. Not that you've been doing any better."

Staring hatefully into his eyes, I didn't acknowledge him.

He shrugged, "suite yourself."

When it was dusk, Liam and Harry switched seats, and Liam began driving while Harry slept.

The kids still haven't woken up yet, and I hope that the dose of GHB didn't kill them. I know that it didn't though, because they're all still breathing.

"You know, you're very persistent with your keeping watch and all," Liam said, his soft brown eyes meeting mine, however I knew better by now.

"I get what you're trying to do, but believe me, you won't regret a couple hours of sleep once we get there. I promise that we won't touch you or your kids until we get there, and when we do I'll be sure to wake you up."

I rolled my eyes in disbelief.

Liam sighed, "I know that you have every reason not to believe me right now, but I have kids of my own, and I know that you feel the constant need to protect them, but doing this won't help them at all."

Instead of glaring at the reflection of his eyes, I watched my kids sleeping faces instead.

Against my own will, I felt my eyelids get heavier and heavier until they closed, and I slowly drifted into a half sleep state.

***

Being a man of his word, Liam shook me awake, "we'll be there in five minutes."

Looking into his eyes, I blinked my red sleepy eyes, hoping that he would understand that I was silently thanking him even if I still hate him.

Maybe this was nature's cruel way of telling me to trust no one but myself and my own children.

***

Once we arrived there, I was horrified to see the back of the van open, and a bunch of random people dressed all in black armed with guns, picked up my children, and slung them over their shoulder.

I tried so hard to protest, to yell, scream, just anything, but I literally couldn't. All I could do was watch them get taken away, and blink as they were.

Liam and Harry got out of the front to walk to the back of the van.

Harry high-fived some people while they congratulated him, and that sick feeling came back again in the pit of my stomach, only stronger this time.

I meant absolutely nothing to Harry, all that I meant was just another completed mission.

Liam lifted me up, and slung me over his shoulder as the others had done with my kids.

"Don't worry," Liam mumbled into my ear, "you'll get to see your kids tonight. They'll be fine, and they probably won't wake up until tomorrow morning."

I was relieved to hear this, even though I would prefer to always be with my kids. Liam stared walking inside, and I memorized every corridor he walked down, and every door he walked by.

He stopped in front of swinging double doors. "They'll just examine you here and not blood types, organs, height, weight, DNA and etc. They'll be doing the same to your children as well, don't worry they won't feel a thing since they're still asleep."

Letting out a relieved breath as Liam entered the double doors, and placed me on a cold metal cart. A man dressed all in black scrubs, armed with a gun as well, stepped out from behind some crates to meet Liam and I.

"Hello there Payne, what have we got here?"

"Just the usual, another carrier that needs examined," Liam answered nonchalantly.

He nodded, his face seemed tired, "of course. Now how about we get started?"

It was a full hour later when this doctor figure had finished examining me everywhere, and probably left me in more pain than I was before. Much to my surprise, he washed the caked blood from my face.

Liam once again bound my limbs, which were previously cut loose by the doctor.

He nodded, "you'll be getting three kids later on today that are his, please be gentle with them."

"Of course I will," the doctor assured.

***

Liam hesitantly placed some sort of black collar around my neck before walking to a door the end of a twisted corridor that was labled 'Breeding Room'.

He then walked into a dimly lit room that held a lot of cages and a few cots that had blood spatters on it. I had a feeling that the cot wasn't for me, at least for now, due to the fact that I could see emaciated children and men inside of the cages.

Bending slightly to unlock a cage, Liam placed my carefully inside of the cold steel cage before locking the door once again.

"Your kids will be in here soon, don't worry," Liam mumbled quietly.

I opened my lips slightly while looking into his brown eyes, and forced a raspy drawn out word past my lips, "wh-y?"

Looking over his shoulder, he scratched the back of his head, "just because I'm part of this, doesn't mean that I agree with what's happening. I've got to go, almost late for a... meeting with the Boss."

Blinking, all I could do was watch as he walked out of the room.

Just as Liam had said, two men came in dressed in black and carrying Kylie and Kyra. Neither of which were conscious yet that I could tell.

I watched closely to what cages they were put in, and much to my relief they were put into to cages across from me so that I was able to see them from where my cage was positioned.

After about fifteen minutes of me watching the steady rise and fall on Kylie and Kyra's chests, I knew that they were alive, and familiar looking man walked in with Kaleb slung over his shoulder.

Kaleb was put into a cage between Kylie and Kyra, around his neck was some sort of collar, the same one that was around my own neck, and I didn't like it a all.

"I sc-scared," I heard Kyra's soft voice say, and for once in my life I heard something in her voice that I haven't heard in years. There was fear, true fear.

"Kn-ow ju-ust lis-sten t'me 'kay?" I forced out, staring into Kyra's dark eyes.

"'Kay, will. Gon' g-et out o' here?"

"'Course," I whispered, though it didn't ome out as confident as I wanted it to.

"D-Dadd-y is no-t ok-ay to l-lie all time." She sniffled. When I saw a small tear roll down her cheek, I wanted desperately to hold her, and assure her that it was going to be okay, however I couldn't.

"P-romise I no lie pr-incess. I pro-mise. Dahey a-ways keep pro-mises."

***

"Here's Tomlinson like you wanted sir," the man holding me said to another man, that I'm guessing is the boss. The man holding me right now is the very same man that carried in Kaleb.

"Ah, here's our target. Has he gone through the inspection already, and has it been confirmed that he's a carrier?"

"Yes Sir, and it has also been confirmed that his son may be one as well."

"Oh this is some news, Nick. Now Mr. Tomlinson," he mocked me. "Do you know why you are here?"

"N-o," I answered honestly, trying my best to not stutter and show weakness, however the simple task of properly articulating words is next to impossible while under the influence of GHB.

He nodded, as if he was processing what I had said, then took out a file that was filled with papers. On the front there was my name, and a picture of me.

"Well, how about we start with this," opening the folder, he took out an old black and white photo of me holding Kaleb when he was a baby. Zayn was playing around with his new camera, and took a few black and white photos of Kaleb and I for this project he had at work.

"'Es," I said, meaning to say 'yes', but it didn't work out well.

"Good good, now you might remember Nick here, as he was one of Zayn's best friends, and co-workers. However, little did Zayn know that Nick has a 'second job' here. Nick's job here is to report any possible male carriers to me, then I'll send out an agent of my choice to bring him here. Do you know what it means to be a carrier?"

"'Es," I said quietly, my doctor had used that term with my countless times during the times I had been pregnant.

"Good, less explaining that I need to do. But anyways, Nick brought me this photo here, then I sent out Harry to fetch you. So that brings us to here and now. Any questions?"

"Why?" I asked, surprised that I didn't slur or stammer through my haze of betrayal.

"Because, we want to impregnate more carriers so that we can sell them off to other... companies like us. Their babies will hopefully be carriers as well. If they aren't then we dispose of them. There are already so many bets on your head right now. However, that can wait."

"'Arry," I whispered more to myself than anyone else.

"Oh yes, it hurts doesn't it? Well don't worry, when it's your turn to be impregnated, I'll be sure to partner you up with Harry." He winked disgustingly at me, and I've never felt so helpless before, even when I had been with Zayn.

***

It's been a day since we've been in this place, and Kylie and Kaleb have finally woken up. Kaleb didn't cry, but Kylie did a lot, and she just wanted to go home. To be honest, I think we all did.

Suddenly, there was a loud cry from one of the cages down from me, and someone screamed out.

"Someone please help him! His water broke!"

Two of the men dressed on black went to their cage, and carried out a frail pregnant boy that was sobbing, and couldn't have been over sixteen.

I shuttered and watch as they carried him out.

"Daddy he gon' be good?" Kaleb asked.

"Yes baby, yes he is."

"He's going to have a baby," Kyra said quietly.

"Oh, okay." Kaleb answered.

***

"Daddy!" Kaleb screamed at the top of his lungs as a man opened his cage, and pulled him out.

"No! Leave him alone!" I yelled at him, "don't you dare fucking touch him!"

The man glared at me, "you and your kids here are going to regret it. Especially because of what I'm here for."

"Please d-don't hurt him. Take me instead, just leave him alone."

"Would if I could, but we need to run a few... tests. Basically we want to see if he can get pregnant." He shrugged as if it were no big deal

"What the Hell is you people's problem! Put down my son!"

Ignoring me, he walked out and didn't come back until later in the day. When Kaleb was put back into his cage, he was crying silent tears, and had large bruises around his neck and on his arms.

Tears sprung to my eyes and I gasped, "what did they do to you baby?"

"G-gave needle, b-but n-no like needles, s-so th-they b-beat me u-up l-like papa d-did."

That night, Kaleb didn't stop crying, and I had to help him to even get through the night.

I hate how weak I am right now, and that I can't even protect my on kids now.

***

The next morning, I hadn't slept at all, and Liam came in, and took out Kaleb's naked and bloody body from his cage. Immediately, Kaleb started screaming.

Liam looked at me with sad eyes, "don't worry, they're just going to examine him, virtually painless."

"You guys are monsters," I croaked out.

He nodded, "I know."

"How can you even live with yourself?" My voice cracked on the last word.

"Just barely," Liam admitted before walking out.

***

Nick came back with Kaleb in his arms, a tired look in his eyes.

"What the Hell was that all about?" I asked once Nick put Kaleb back into his cage.

"They wanted to confirm whether of not he was impregnated or not, and the results are inconclusive so far."

He shrugged, "you never now. We've had cases where carriers as young as eight have gotten pregnant. If your four year son here gets pregnant, then it would be quite a big discovery in our research."

"That's sick," I whispered, my voice cracking, my nausea getting stronger.

"Oh, it's quite fascinating actually," Nick contradicted me.

Gagging, I puked up what little food I had left in my body, until I was just dry heaving.

He smirked, "how pathetic."

***

It wasn't until a week later when we got the results back, and much to my relief Kaleb was not pregnant, just badly injured. However, much to my horror, a day later the same man from before came in.

"Now looks like we just gotta try again, only a different method," he smirked evilly at Kaleb with his yellow stained teeth.

Kaleb whimpered, backing into the far corner of his cage.

"No please," I pleaded, tears coming to my eyes. "Take me instead, please don't take him again. I won't resist or anything, just please don't touch him again!"

Tapping his scruffy chin in thought, he walked slowly over to my cage, "I don't know if I should. Your kid over there looks like he has a pretty tight ass."

"But I'm more experienced, and can please you more," I countered.

He nodded, "that you can, however I heard that you're reserved for Styles."

A tear slid down my cheek, and I sniffled, "just please don't touch my baby."

"Okay, tell you what. Once Styles gets his turn with you, I'll go with you the day after. As long as I get my turn with you, I won't touch him, understand? However, if you resist at all, then I won't hold back at all, got it?"

I nodded, and he walked out.

"Tank you Dahey," Kaleb sniffled.

"Sh, I'll do anything to keep you guys safe," I said, wiping away the tear off my cheek that had fell previously.

***

A couple days after the incident, I saw a pair of cold green eyes that I never wanted to see again. Kyra glared at him as Harry knelt down and looked at me in the eyes.

"Hello there Lou Lou, I know that this sucks. This sucks for me too, but it's something that I have to do." Harry shrugged, unlocking my cage, and tugging on my arm to pull me out.

A lump started forming in my throat, and I nearly started to cry as Harry lead me to a blood spattered cot, attempting to get me to lay down on it.

I shook my head, letting out a string of weak no's.

"Could've sworn that Anthony told me about a little... agreement between you two about agreeing?" Harry raised a threatening brow.

"Just, can you do it somewhere not in front of the kids?" I asked lowly, my hands shaking slightly from my nerves.

"And why should I do that?" Harry asked, harshly pinning me to the cot to the point of pain. "Why should I listen to you, exactly? Last time I checked, you aren't my boss."

"It's- it's j-just I d-don't w-want them to see b-because th-they've already seen and ex-perienced enough, I d-don't want th-them to add thi-s to their l-list," I stuttered out.

Harry's eyes softened slightly, and he nodded, letting me up, "well go ahead and choose a cot then." He pointed a finger towards the end of the room, away from my kids.

I rushed out a quick thank you before heading walking to a cot all the way at the end with barely any blood spatters there. He nodded his head, "take your clothes off."

Keeping my eyes on the dirty tiled floor, I began to slowly undress myself, knowing that Harry was staring at me, watching my every move.

Once I had nothing on, besides the collar, Harry pushed me down onto the cot, spreading my legs. Turning my head to the side, I focused on trying to steady my breathing while staring at empty cages.

While staring at the cages, I couldn't help but wonder if I were to become pregnant, would my children have to stay in those cages? Bile crawled up my throat at the mere thought.

I looked at the tiled at my clothes, and Harry's clothes too now.

(Warning graphic sorta)

Slippery fingers poked and prodded at my entrance as his other hand pinned both of my hands painfully above my head.

Then painfully, and all at once, Harry slammed three fingers in. Bowing my back off of the cot, I yelled in pain.

However, instead of waiting for me to adjust, Harry immediately began thrusting and spreading his fingers, avoiding my prostate, not making it at all more comfortable.

"You're lucky you get any prep at all. Not everyone does." Harry said, focused on his movements.

Whimpering, I bit my bottom lip to try and silence myself.

I felt a bit of relief once Harry's fingers pulled out. However, my body felt as if it were on fire once Harry started to push his member into me.

A sob left my lips once he was all the way in. "'Arr-y, hu-hurts," I sobbed.

Harry murmured into my ear, as he thrusted faster and rougher into me. "Remember when I said that I was nothing like Zayn? Well I didn't lie in that sense, because I am much much worse."

(IT'S OVER AND TIME SKIP!!!)

***

(Harry's p.o.v.)

It's been concluded that Louis Tomlinson is pregnant.

And it's my baby.

A baby that I helped to make.

I've never felt this way before. My heart dropped into my stomach once we found out, and I honestly couldn't help but ask for a picture of the ultrasound.

In the picture, the baby was no more than a small white blob in the picture, and it was mine. No, he or she was Louis and I's baby.

Honestly, I don't deal with impregnating the carriers. My job is to reel them in, and that's it. This is a feeling so much bigger than what I've ever felt before.

I need to find a way to protect the baby, and Louis, because they are targets mine after all.


	3. Part Three~ Trust Like you Hope, and Hope Like You Breathe

When I pictured having children with Harry, I never imagined that it would go down like this.

Every day I have to get my blood drawn twice, a sonogram, and this special shot. I haven't seen Harry once since he's gotten me knocked up. However, on the contrary, Liam has visited me nearly every day since.

I have been pregnant for a month now, and every morning, I puke up whatever I ate the previous day, which is usually not much.

No one has attempted to touch any of my kids since I've gotten pregnant, thank God.

I haven't been eating much since they barely feed my kids anything, so I force Liam to give them my share instead.

No one in here dares to talk to me, afraid that they'll somehow get into trouble.

There's apparently a place that they call 'The Chamber' where you'll end up if we do something wrong. None of my kids or I have ended up there yet, and I hope that we don't.

However, the boy that had given birth not so long ago had to go there when he refused to give up his baby, and he they ended up taking his baby away.

We haven't seen the baby since, but the next time I saw the boy, he was badly bruised, and bleeding in several places.

Harry walked in and over to my cage, a determined and stern look in his eyes as he unlocked my cage, tugging harshly on my arm. Of course I complied, not wanting my children to somehow get hurt.

"What are you going to do to him?" Kyra asked sternly, glaring at Harry through the metal bars.

Ignoring her, Harry painfully tugged me towards the door.

"I asked you a question! Where the Hell are you taking my Dad!? If you don't tell me now, then I suggest that you take your disgusting hands off of him you rapist!" Kyra yelled at Harry, and this time he turned to look towards her, his eyes angry.

"Call me that again, and see what happens to your Dad here."

I looked into Kyra's dark and hard eyes, begging her to drop it.

When she didn't answer, Harry scoffed, "yeah that's what I thought." He turned back towards me, and I followed him on shaking legs outside of the large room.

"I'm not doing what you think I am," Harry spoke lowly into my ear from behind me as he tightly bound my hands with ropes.

Staying silent, I stared at the tiled floor, flinching slightly when Harry's fingers wrapped around my elbow. He began leading me further down the hallway.

"I'll... explain in a second, but just not here, there are cameras," Harry said under his breath, but I heard him.

Liam walked towards us, his eyes were confused, but he didn't let it show, and followed Harry as well. We reached another door that Harry unlocked, then opened.

He nodded his head towards the direction of the dark room, however once Liam and I stepped inside, the lights immediately came on. Harry closed the door behind him, and I heard it click as it automatically locked behind him.

"No cameras in here, so they don't know what we're planning at all. So Liam... I need your help with something." Harry explained, plopping down onto the bed, and I stood awkwardly by the door as Liam sat in a chair.

"It depends on what it is," Liam said carefully.

"I need you help to get Louis and his kids out by next week." Harry said, stealing a small glance at me, and my eyes widened slightly. "Come sit down Louis, don't want to hurt yourself anymore than necessary."

Biting my lip, I sat awkwardly, and very uncomfortably on the very edge of his bed, wanting to be far away from him.

Harry untied the knot he had tied in the ropes around my wrists. "Good, now Liam what are your thoughts?"

His dark eyes went between Harry and I, "it depends on whether or not you'll be coming back."

Harry shook his head, eyes landing on my very slightly protruding stomach, "nope, I won't be. He's pregnant with my child after all, so I decided to stay with him."

I shifted a bit from where I was sitting, feeling nausea kindle in the pit of my stomach.

Liam nodded slowly, taking out a small device, scrolling through something, "does it have to be by next week? This week is going to be pretty hectic, Harry."

"I know, but we have to do it by then, because the Boss is planning to put Louis's kids in the auction next week."

"Okay, I may be able to, but it will have to be soon, and during the day since that would be when the Boss would least expect it since it'll be so busy. We'll need a jet, and you'll need to pack your things up by then Harry."

I frowned, "but- but what ab-bout the c-cameras?"

"What about them?" Harry asked, and I bit my lip.

"There's no need to worry about the cameras seeing us, because as far as everyone else would know, Harry's transporting you guys to another... Base." Liam checked the little device again, "I can book one of our jets for the day after tomorrow, so be ready by then, understood?"

Harry nodded, and I nodded as well.

***

"Are... are you staying here Liam?" I quietly asked the next day.

He nodded, "well yes, but I'll know where you guys are, and I'll drop in from time to time, so don't worry."

"Then wouldn't it be hard to get us out?" I whispered.

"Not if I'm unidentifiable," Liam smirked slightly.

I nodded, "okay, where are we going to go?"

"A friend of Harry and I's that lives in Ireland. Well, he's more of my friend than Harry's," he sighed slightly. "He may not like Harry much, but he'll definitely take you guys in."

"And we will be safe there?"

"Yes you will, I promise that you will be, just trust me."

"Don't ask me to do something that I can't," I whispered, lightly placing a hand over my just barely there baby bump.

***

The next day, as expected, Harry and Liam came to unlock our cages, while they were both wearing masks.

They bound Kylie, Kyra, Kaleb, and I's hands behind our backs as we headed into the hallway.

Many people wearing masks walked by us, but Nick happened to walk by us, also wearing a mask. However, I could tell his confusion and suspicion towards us was strong as he stopped us from walking.

"And where do you guys think you're going with the Tomlinsons?"

Harry spoke, making his voice a lot more deeper and rang with authority, "to the flight field. The Tomlinsons are going to get transported to another Base in America."

"And whose orders are you on? The Boss said that the kids are up for an auction next week," Nick took a threatening step towards us.

I could feel my pulse quicken.

"Boss' orders, Nick. Where else do you think the auction is taking place?"

For a moment, Nick and Harry stared each other down, however I was surprised as Nick stepped aside, nodding.

Harry nodded back, and we thankfully continued walking.

We exchanged hugs and good byes with Liam before boarding a private jet. Harry removed Kaleb and I's collars, because they were a tracking device.

Then just like that we were off to Ireland.

***

The moment Harry's tired blond haired friend opened the door and saw us, he sighed tiredly, "what did you do now?"

"Well you know how the Boss is looking for more carriers...?" Harry asked.

"Harry, please tell me that you didn't drag this poor family into it." He said pleadingly.

"Well I did, but I.... I ended up getting Louis here pregnant," Harry answered, almost guiltily as he he placed a large hand on my baby bump, covering the entire small bump. I flinched away from his touch.

"You didn't," he whispered, don't tell me that you..." He trailed off, eyes landing on my kids.

Harry nodded, "I did."

Much to my surprise, the blond haired, rage took over his features as his hand collided harshly with Harry's cheek. "You son of a female dog, what the Hell do you want from me now?"

"I want to stay here with Louis and his kids to hide out from the Boss."

"I don't care if they stay here with me, but why should I let you stay here too?" He asked, raising an eyebrow, "I bet they don't even want you around, so what's the use in acting like you care?"

"M'not acting if it's true. I decided that it's about time that I take responsibility for my actions, and help Louis raise our baby."

I flinched as he said that, hating how foriegn it sounded coming out of his mouth.

Harry's friend glared, "give me one good reason why I should let you stay here."

"Because you and Louis can't take care of the kids on your own with Louis being pregnant and all, and he needs someone to take care of him as well so I can definitely do that."

***

Turns out the blond's name is Niall, and Niall ended up slapping Harry again when he saw the many small needle punctures in my arms.

"How many times did they stick you?" Niall asked, gently taking my arm into his hands, inspecting the tiny punctures.

"Uhm a-a lot, least t-twice a day." I confessed, slightly biting the inside of my cheek.

Kaleb lightly tugged at my shirt while Kylie clung to my pant leg and carefully, I picked Kaleb up with shaky arms. Kyra stood defensively crossing her arms beside me. Thankfully, Harry went out to buy a few things.

"That's horrible, mate, you must feel so weak right now. Here sit down on the couch. You all must be starving, I know they don't feed you guys well there. I'll get you all something to eat, sounds good? Do any of you guys have any allergies at all?"

It was quiet for a few moments before Kyra spoke up, "I have a peanut allergy."

Niall nodded, "how ironic, so do I."

After long minutes of Niall talking to us from the kitchen, he had finally finished making a large plateful of fajitas, and placed them on the coffee table.

Kaleb and Kylie didn't hesitate before digging into the hot food, not complaining when it burned their mouths. Kyra waited a few moments, and gauged the younger two's reaction. When she figured it was good to eat, she grabbed a fajita as well, chewing slowly.

Niall's eyes landed on my stomach that was slightly potruding from underneathe my sweatshirt. "How many months along are you?"

"Month actually, just one," I answered.

"Wow, that's really impressive. How did you handle all that for a month?"

"Well, it's not anything that I wasn't used to." I answered, shrugging.

"Ah, so did they tell you that you're having twins?" Niall asked casually.

"Twins?" I whispered, laying a light hand on my stomach, "what gives you that impression?"

"You wouldn't be showing yet if it weren't," Niall said quietly. "I can't believe that they didn't tell you... I assumed that you knew."

"Oh..." I trailed off.

"Sorry to ruin the surprise. I really thought that you knew." Niall said apologetically.

"It's- it's fine," I stuttered slightly. "Better to know now than be surprised later."

"Okay then, if that's your mentality. You should really start eating before your kids eat them all, though." Niall gestured towards the disappearing plate of fajitas.

***

Harry didn't come back later that night while the kids were all fast asleep in their new rooms, and I was on the couch across from Niall.

My eyes were starting to get heavy, but I didn't want to go to sleep. Niall noticed this as I started talking to stay awake.

"So Niall," I yawned, my words were drawn out to the point where I nearly sounded drunk. "How do you know so much about the Boss and- and all that?"

"I used to be a part of it, believe it or not. I was an agent with everything I could have wanted. Liam, Harry, and I all worked side by side. Liam and I were involved... romantically, but no one knew but Harry. One day Liam didn't use a condom, and I got pregnant. I had to get thrown into one of those damn cages. Liam helped me to escape, and it was successful, but he stayed. However Liam didn't take the collar off of me which was bad because there was a tracking device in it. They found me, killed my baby, and ran more tests on me. They found out that I was only able to get pregnant once, and were going to kill me. However, Liam loved me enough to set me free. Haven't heard from him since. So well... that's how I know how it feels to be involved with the Boss... in both aspects."

I nodded in understanding, "I know how much it hurts to get your baby taken away from you. I had a... miscarriage myself. It's an unforgivable act."

"But you wouldn't really know that. You didn't have someone kill your baby." Niall said icily, turning to look outside the dark window.

"Actually I do I just... Really can't explain it right now." I said quietly.

"You should really sleep," Niall suggested softly, his voice tired.

And, well, he sure didn't have to tell me twice.

***

In the morning, I awoke to see Kaleb, Kylie, and Kyra sitting on the floor by the couch I was laying on.

Sitting up, I stretched and yawned, "good morning you three. How did you all sleep?"

"Very good, no nightmares," Kaleb said, turning to look at me.

"Same," Kyra said while Kylie nodded in agreement.

"Good, I think that this place is magical like Narnia," I grinned slightly.

Kylie giggled, "I always wanted to go to Narnia."

Kyra rolled her eyes, "Narnia is so stupid, so many people died from trusting, and so many people had hope, even though it didn't help with much."

"Well," Kylie said offended. "You have to trust like you hope, and that's what the Narnians did, and they ended up winning."

"Yes... I guess that's right," I agreed.

However, I know that in my heart I wouldn't be able to ever trust Harry after what he did to us, to my family.

***

Harry didn't come back until the next night with quite a few bags in his hands, and when he did, Niall nearly slapped him again, but refrained himself.

"What the Hell were you doing out?" He asked.

"Errands," Harry answered simply, setting the bags down.

"I could have gotten those! Harry you guys can't just go out! Do you know how many Bases will have it out for you all? They aren't looking for me anymore, it's been years!"

Harry rolled his eyes, "calm down, damn. I just had to pick up a few things. Quit acting like such a blond."

"Styles, you don't understand! If someone happened to see you, then they could report you instantly! They have eyes everywhere!"

"Fine fine, I get it, now calm your tits." Harry picked up the bags again, and walked over to me. "These are for you." He dropped the bags at my feet before walking back upstairs.

"What did he get you?" Niall asked, sitting close to me so that our knees touched.

"Not sure..." I trailed off, picking up a plastic bag and going through it, my heart clenching once I did. "Oh..."

Niall's eyes softened slightly as he saw the clothes in the bag. The kids have been wearing whatever we could find of Niall's clothes that would fit, and the same for me. "That was very thoughtful of him."

"Yeah it was." A lump formed in my throat as I went through another bag to find baby clothes and food as well as 'maternity' clothes for me.

***

"What the Hell is wrong with you?!" Zayn yelled at me, getting in my face. When I tried backing away, I only ended up bumping into someone else. 

"You know what Tomlinson? For someone that can't trust anyone, you sure were quick to let me into your home. Boy did that make my job a Hell of a lot easier." Harry said smugly into my ear.

I whimpered, flinching away when Harry placed his hands on my extended stomach, "H-Harry please st-stop, it h-hurts. Don't hur-t the b-bab-ies." I tried to somehow pry his hands away from me, but he held a firm grip.

"How pathetic," Zayn spat.

From behind me I could feel Harry nod agreeingly, "especially since you can't even stop being a slut and keep getting your ass pregnant."

"You know what, Harry since he wants to get it in like a slut, why don't we give it to him like a slut," Zayn suggested.

"Good idea," Harry smirked, pushing my to my knees. My heart began to race faster, and not in the good way.

I looked at him, my eyes filling with tears already, and not able to form coherent sentences. "N-no, Harry pl-ease, the- the baby, please, th-the b-babies-" was all I was able to get out before Harry cut me off.

"Look at that Zayn, he's getting so desperate that he's begging for it."

"No," I whimpered.

Harry raised an eyebrow, "but why not babe? Don't you love me anymore?"

"Louis wake up." I heard Niall say softly while shaking me lightly.

I frowned, sniffling a bit. "Ni-Niall?"

"Yes it's just Niall, it's a dream Louis. Come on and wake up. Just blink a couple times for me?"

As I shut my eyes, all I was able to see was the green of Harry's eyes before darkness completely surrounded me once more. When I opened them again, I came face to face with Niall's icy blue eyes. Biting my lip to withhold a sob, I sat up, placing my hands over my stomach.

"Wh-wher'es Ha-rry and Z-Zayn?" I whimpered, a tear rolling down my cheek.

"Sh, they're not here," Niall said quietly, pulling me into a hug. "You're okay, and so are the babies."

Niall continued to repeat the same words in my ear as I silently cried into his neck.

***

The next day when Harry came downstairs to find me on the couch conversing with Niall, he immediately sat next to me.

"Good morning Lou Lou," he said cheerfully, a bit too cheerful for my taste. "Niall, do you mind if Louis and I can talk alone just for a little bit?"

I tensed slightly and looked at Niall with pleading eyes, not wanting to be left alone with Harry right now.

Crossing his arms, Niall shook his head, "I would mind it actually."

Harry let out a sharp aggravated breath, mood quickly going from cheerful to frustrated. "And why is that?"

"Well gee I wonder but maybe it's because I don't trust you around him or his kids at all, neither do they trust you with their own selves. What makes you think that I'll trust you now? Styles, you fucking raped him why the Hell would he want to be left alone with him?" Niall said, keeping his voice low so that he wouldn't wake the kids, but it was still menacing.

"Fine, I get it." Harry rolled his eyes.

"If you want to talk to him, you can, but as long as I am here." Niall shrugged, "but I warn you that if you do or say anything that would upset any of them even in the slightest you are out of here, got it?"

In confirmation, Harry nodded.

"So Louis..."

I bit the inside of my cheek at the sound of my name, and acknowledged him with a slight nod.

"How did you sleep?" Harry asked, "if you did sleep, that is. By the looks of it, you didn't sleep any."

"Horribly," I answered coldly, surprising even myself with how I sounded.

"That is... quite understandable. Even the most resolute of people can walk out of the Base with nightmares," Harry's eyes lingered on Niall as he said this, then he looked back at me. "So uhm... I just wanted to apologize for all that I had done to you and your family, because you guys really didn't deserve it, and I know it was wrong. I am sorry for whatever pain any of you had to endure while you were there whether or not it was caused by me. I'd like to ask for your forgiveness. Of course I would n't be surprised if you don't forgive me."

"Well you're right about one thing," I cleared my throat.

There was absolute silence as Niall and Harry waited with baited breath for me to continue. I felt nausea coil in my stomach at the attention.

"That I won't be forgiving you." I stood up, "now excuse me."

The rest of that day I spent half of it puking and the other half laying in Niall's bed sleeping. Niall insisted that I should have his bed and he'll take the couch since I'm the pregnant one. I felt too sick to disagree, besides a nice warm bed after a month wouldn't do any harm.

***

It's been a week, and the nightmares still haven't stopped.

Being pregnant is horrible, especially when I have to take of three other kids even though Niall does his best, he still has to keep Harry in check himself.

There was an almost incident on Monday when an agent from the Base came looking for Harry, the kids and I, Niall opened the door, and the situation was avoided since he was obviously newly recruited, and therefore didn't recognize Niall.

Liam came to visit on Thursday and stayed until Friday. His help was greatly needed, and accepted, as well as his company.

Niall was glad to see him, as were the kids.

Whenever Niall and Liam would kiss, I honestly couldn't help but feel a hint of jealousy, wanting someone to kiss me like that, but I quickly had to get rid of those thoughts knowing that it would never happen.

The other day, Harry had given me my phone, saying that he had it the whole time the kids and I were in the cages, and he had forgotten to give it to me.

There were literally over a thousand missed calls and missed text messages, most of them that came from my mum. But I ignored those, not in the mood to talk to my mum.

My phone started vibrating from my pocket, and I almost didn't check it, but I nearly dropped it once I did.

Biting the inside of my cheek I accepted the call. "Hello Zayn?"

"Hey Louis, where have you and the kids been? Everyone's worried about you guys." Zayn's voice sounded worried, and he may not have treated us well, but there were those moments when he actually did care. Then again to contradict those thoughts, I also remember that he's the one that had killed my baby.

I sniffled a bit as a lump formed in my throat, "that's not important, all that matters is that we're okay, and nothing... nothing's wrong."

"Louis what's wrong? You're obviously upset about something," I heard the concern in his voice. "Are you sure that you and the kids are okay?"

At first I nodded, forgetting that he couldn't see me, "I'm fine, we're all just- just fine." My voice cracked at the end of my sentence, and a tear spilled over, but I quickly wiped it away. "I... I just have a cold." I sniffled again to try proving my point.

"Oh... I hope that you feel better soon then. Listen, I've been thinking, and I have a question to ask you." Zayn hesitated a bit before continuing, "what would you say if I suggested that we get back together again?"

"Zayn..." I trailed off, cupping my mouth to prevent a sob from escaping.

"Come on Lou, I've been to anger management classes. I've changed, Lou I really have."

"Your time t-to ch-change would have been be-fore all of th-is. B-before the div-orce." I answered, clearing my voice, and placing a hand on my growing baby bump to try and calm my nerves.

"Lou, you of all people should know that nobody's perfect. If you're still talking about the whole incident with our baby, that was your fault not mine. Everyone deserves a second chance right? So why can't you give me one?"

"You m-may not be p-perfect, but what did we deserve for you to hurt us? And wh-what have you done to des-erve a second chance?" My voice turned harsh as he brought up Kacy.

"Come on Lou don't be like this please."

"Do what? State the tr-uth?" I asked, adrenaline suddenly spiking through me, "well here's the truth. You did it! It's y-your fault not mine! You killed my baby! You kicked my tummy-" I broke off in a sob. "I tried to st-stop you but I couldn't! None of us could! Do you fucking think that you- you still deserve another fucking chance!?"

I sobbed and the line went dead as Zayn hung up.

***

That night I ended up having another nightmare, or flashback more like, of Zayn killing Kacy. Niall had to wake me up again since I was screaming hysterically.

"You know... I heard you when you were on the phone earlier," Niall said tentatively.

"I know," I said, voice hoarse. "Everyone probably did."

Niall shrugged, "yeah, but who cares. I'm glad that you stood up to him, though. Whoever he was, he really sounded like a douche."

"He was, and still is."

He nodded, "and Louis, it really wasn't your fault."

I looked down at my lap, "I know that now."

Niall pulled a pill bottle out of his pocket and tossed it to me, "here, for you. It's safe for the babies, it helps with the dreams, and I took it when I was... pregnant, and my prescription still hasn't changed so I could get you more if they work."

"Thanks Niall." I grinned for the first time.

***

Over the few months I have been taking the pills that Niall gives me.

They make me numb, and make my nights dreamless so that I can actually sleep.

In fact, I'm actually able to calm down Kyra, Kylie, or Kaleb from time to time when they have their own nightmares. 

Things between Harry and I have been somewhat getting better. I can trust him enough to talk alone with him, but I don't trust him around the kids still. He touches me sometimes, just small ones from pats on the back when I'm puking in the morning, to rubbing my baby bump when I'm tired.

Niall has become one of my best friends, and the one that I go to when I need to talk. Liam is my only other best friend even if he does only come by at most three times a month. He tries to visit at least once a month, and when he comes, he and I usually talk. He spends time with the kids when Niall and I go out shopping.

He knows a place where we can shop and not be identified by people from the Base.

Niall has gone way out of his way, and sold the furniture in the guest bedrooms so that he could buy a bunk bed for the girls, a larger bed for Kaleb, and a queen bed for the second bedroom, which Harry was sleeping in. However, Harry decided that since I'm going to have a baby within the upcoming months that I should have my own bed, so he gave it up and sleeps on the couch.

Harry chose to surprise me one day by going out on an errand, and coming back with a bunch of baby items including more clothes, two cribs, baby clothes, baby bottles, a playpen, and so much more.

In response Niall cleared out the storage room, and Harry helped, and they began to set it up as a nursery.

So yeah, everything is starting to mend as time goes on with every breath that we breathe.

***

I shushed Kyra, rubbing her back slightly in attempts to wake her up from her nightmare. "Kyra come on and wake up Hon."

She frowned in her sleep and turned on her other side so that she was facing me. That was exactly how I was able to tell she was having a nightmare, because Kyra is usually a sound sleeper.

"Kyra it's just a nightmare, not real, okay darling. Come on and wake up. Come back to me love."

Mumbling a few things, her frown deepened, but then suddenly her eyes opened, and she looked straight into mine. "D-Dad?"

"Yes, it's me, Love." I assured her.

"It was horrible, they were trying to dissect and study me as if I were some kind of- of animal!" Her face contorted in anger and fear.

I shushed her, hugging her tightly, "it's okay now. I'm here, and I'll protect you, and will never let anyone hurt you ever."

"You can't always protect us, Dad. Especially now that you're pregnant. That's Niall and Harry's jobs now. Yours is to keep the babies healthy."

"Okay, but you all are always my first priority regardless what happens. Kyra... do you remember that night?"

Kyra nodded, knowing what night I was talking about.

"Do you remember when you said that you wanted to talk to me?"

Once again she nodded.

"Do you, by any chance, remember what you were going to say?" I asked carefully.

Kyra nodded, "I was going to warn you that Harry was going to hurt you somehow, because I heard him talking on the phone with Liam that morning about how he couldn't wait to get his hands on you."

Restraining myself from flinching, I nodded, "okay. Thanks for telling me now."

"But I didn't get to tell you on time," she tried arguing.

"No, but you tried, at least." I grinned slightly, "It's not your fault you know. It would have happened anyways, I'm just grateful that we were able to get out alive."

***

Darkness surrounded me, as it usually does in my dreams.

However, a familiar pain spiked through me, and I whimpered.

A scene played in my head, but it wasn't a familiar one.

Harry's hand strokes my baby bump lightly, and I flinched slightly at the pain that came from it.

"H-Harry?"

Harry shushed me, "just close your eyes babe, it'll make the pain go away."

Blushing slightly, I let my eyes shut only to open them a few seconds later.

I gasped as a completely different scene played flickered me.

Harry had a knife in his hands, and he was using it to cut open my stomach.

I screamed, "H-Harry! Stop it! Don't kill the baby!" When I tried to push him away, I found myself unable to move, and I sobbed. "Please, don't make me go through this again!"

Harry shushed me again, "just close your eyes babe, it'll make the pain go away."

When I did close my eyes, the pain only intensified, making me scream even louder.

"Louis come on wake up!" I heard Harry's panicked voice.

Sobbing I shook my head, "hurts t-too mu-ch."

"Come on Lou Lou just open your eyes! You need to calm down okay?"

Sniffling, I opened my eyes and found myself gazing into Harry's soft green eyes. "Hurts so much," I whimpered, a couple tears fell from my eyes.

Harry quickly thumbed the tears away, "I know it does. You went into labor while you were sleeping, so that must have triggered a nightmare."

Burying my head into his neck, I cried out in pain as another contraction hit me.

"I know love, I know. Come on let's get your shorts off so that Niall can help you deliver the baby easier." Harry suggested, asking for my permission as well.

I nodded my consent, and leaned back against the many pillows that I have acquired. Harry silently removed my shorts, and I lifted my hips when needed.

Sobbing loudly when a contraction hit, I gripped the sheets tightly.

Harry's eyes softened, and he lifted my shirt so that it was showing my baby bump. Leaning in, he gently kissed my extended stomach.

Niall bursted in carrying three large boxes at a time, and immediately Harry went to help. They started to empty the contents of the boxes, and Niall rushed to fill a syringe with a clear liquid once he put on blue gloves.

"Okay Louis, just breathe in and out. You're doing so well right now. Remember how the breathing goes? In through your nose, out through your mouth."

Following Niall's instructions, I went through with the well known breathing technique to help calm my breathing.

"Good, exactly like that okay. Now this may hurt a bit, but turn on your side so that I can eject this epidural."

With Harry's help, I turned onto my side, and Niall quickly gave me the injection before I was able to go back to laying on my back.

"Okay, now hold on to Harry's hand, because you know how much this part can hurt. You are fully dilated, so you can start pushing on the count of three."

Many long minutes later filled with a lot of hand squeezing and pushing, I had pushed out the second baby. Their twin was in Harry's arms, a boy.

Niall's eyes widened as I heard tiny painful gasping noises.

"Harry give Louis the first baby, and set up the nasal prong and oxygen tank." Niall said urgently while lightly patting the small newborn on the back, and whispering small reassurances.

Immediately, Harry placed the baby he was holding into my arms, and I tiredly watched as Niall Harry quickly went through a box, then started to set up exactly what Niall had told him to.

"S'our bee-bee okay?" I slurred slightly from exhaustion.

"She's just really having difficulty breathing." Niall said reassuringly.

"Finished!" Harry said, holding a small nasal tube out to Niall's waiting hand.

With a skilled hand, Niall carefully fitted the prongs into my baby's tiny nose. After a few moments with baited breath, Niall nodded.

"She's okay. Have to wear this for a few weeks, but she will live."

***

We ended up naming the girl Kirsten Abella and the boy Keagan Ave, still keeping up the K streak. 

***

The next day while Harry was carefully feeding Kirsten and I was feeding Keagan, I cleared my throat.

"Thank you for helping me last night."

Harry nodded, "your welcome. It's the least that I could do to help."

"So... we have babies together now... that sounds weird to say."

"Yeah..." Harry trailed off.

"I have something important to say. We aren't together, and we may never be, but that's okay as long as you stay, because I do still need you around you know. In that aspect, you aren't like Zayn since you didn't see them as a mistake. And well, I'm not saying that I forgive you but... I am saying that you have earned my trust again."

Harry grinned slightly, "thanks for trusting me again, I will do my best to not let you down again, and I hope that one day you can forgive me."

***

It's been five years and we still haven't completely healed, but the Base is nothing more than a memory now.

Kyra is nineteen and looking for a job so that she can eventually buy a flat of her own.

Kylie is eleven, nearly twelve growing smarter and smarter as she grows, and has remained optimistic.

Kaleb is ten, and had long forgotten Zayn and what we had to go through at the Base. He gets nightmares on occasions, but it's nothing that I can't handle. His creativity truly has no bounds, and people have actually wanted to purchase his paintings.

Kirsten and Keagan are the two that don't get along with each other when they want to, but they will when they need to.

Liam decided to also escape from the clutches of the Boss, and stays with us now.

Niall and Liam got married a couple years ago, and had a wedding here.

Harry and I are growing closer to each other, as is our hope that we will one day be able to actually commit and be together.

And believe me, we hope like we breathe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Thanks so much for reading!!! I hope that you liked it!

**Author's Note:**

> AN: There we go! I'm gonna stop it at that! So tell me, what are your thoughts on this so far? I know that it was super fast, but that was only because I really wanted to post something this week, so here you go.


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